scentsy has synesthesia

scentsy, for those of you who don't know, is a wickless candle company thingamajig.

i attended an in-home scentsy party yesterday and i came away with 4 things. well, 5:

1. a purchase (Christmas is coming, so no details allowed)
2. too much (delicious) food
3. wonderful friends!
4. the discovery that somebody at the scentsy company has synesthesia and, ok, so shoot me......
5. too much wine

#5 will not be the subject of today's post.

but, #4 will be.


synesthesia, for those of you who don't know, is basically when the senses get all fouled up. and so, what happens is, people who have synesthesia (i do) can smell sounds or taste sounds or hear numbers or feel colors or crazy stuff like that. without LSD!

so, yesterday, i discovered that somebody - or maybe more than one somebody - at the scentsy company has synesthesia because, get a load of some of these fragrances:

silver bells

lucky in love

my dear watson

be still

just breathe

echo

flutter

love story

whiteout

eskimo kiss


i don't know about you, but truly? off the top of my head? and even off the bottom of my head? i never knew that "whiteout" had a smell. i mean, i knew that the stuff in the little bottle to cover up mistakes has a smell, but that's not what scentsy's "whiteout" smells like. what scentsy's "whiteout" smells like, is, well.......nothin. and that's what it smells like to someone (me) who has synesthesia! imagine what it must smell like to those of you (most of you) who don't! i guess it must smell like double (or) nothin! or somethin.

i didn't smell "eskimo kiss" or "just breathe" cuz i wasn't sure if the scentsy people had brushed their teeth before making those fragrances. (the scentsy people don't disclose stuff like that.)

anyway........so, now you know........

"echo" and "flutter" smell like something.

which just goes to prove that somebody at scentsy has synesthesia.


or maybe just good (business) sense.

the way everything keeps pissing me off is driving me crazy

no. i do not think occupy anywhere is right.

yes. i think obama ended the war as much for political reasons as anything else. can i prove it? no. can you prove that there's not a God? no. but you believe it anyway.

no. i do not think that this country is on the right course. it's on the left course. which is not right.

no. i do not think it makes one freaking iota bit of sense for a teacher to tell her students to write a paragraph about how a bicycle probably feels.

yes. i am 100%, without a doubt, totally and unequivocally supportive of the muskingum county sheriff's decision to put down dozens of dangerous animals so that they, oh, i don't know, don't. eat. people.

no. i do not think there is such a thing as a worthy politician. yes. i think they're all jerks. yes, including our current president. yes, i have the audacity to say that.

no. i do not think that rich people are bad.



no. i do not think that how i feel about all of these things - or about any other thing - should cause me to run to the ACLU to get them to protect my right to feel. and no. i do not think that how you feel does, either.

yes. i am pretty dang sick and tired of it all.

no. i am not gonna sue somebody over it.



yes. i would like to.

turns out, i DO have a chest and the reason i know is that i have some things to get off it.

i saw a pro-life poster this week with the picture of an unborn baby and the words, "pretend i'm a tree and save me." i don't know how the hell you can't hear the wake-up call in that one.


you would not know that abby and eli have 2-year old twins and newborn triplets in their house. you just plain wouldn't know it. everything that everybody worried and fretted about just plain hasn't happened. to my knowledge, all 5 have never screamed at the same time. the triplets are on a schedule and have been since day one. you walk in the house and it is organized. there are significant periods of quiet and calm, but not so much  that it's unnatural. in between those quiet and calm times, things are lively and loud! when the twins aren't home, abby and eli usually have a candle or two going and the house smells wonderful. who ever would have thought that, of all things, abby and eli would have time to light candles - but they do.

the bottles and all the rest of the feeding paraphernalia are lined up neatly on the kitchen counter. extra bottles - full of breast milk or formula - are always available. i have never once not had a bottle just ready to go. i remember when abby was a baby and, try as i might, i was always a bottle or two short when feeding time rolled around, and i had to hold a crying baby in the crook of my neck and try to assemble a bottle with one hand. i have never seen anyone do that at abby and eli's.

they keep those blanket thingies for swaddling in the crib, along with a blanket, a burp pad, a pacifier, and a cuddly stuffed animal for each baby, and those things are always there. they are always there and they are always laid out neatly and in order, 1-2-3, all in a cute little row. all you have to do is snuggle each baby into his or her own little papoose and away you go.

the beds are made.

the toys, during playtime, are all over the place and yet, not all over the place. the twins have learned (ok, are learning) where the playroom is and they are being taught to keep their toys there. which isn't to say that they don't have toys in their bedrooms because of course, they do. but they know which toys belong in which room and they can play with wild abandon within those respective rooms. but. once playtime is over, it's time to clean up. do they like this? no, they do not. do abby and eli have to keep coaching and teaching them, over and over, how to do it? yes, they do. do abby and eli just give up, sigh, and just go ahead and clean it up themselves because it's easier that way and besides, they have their hands full feeding 3 babies? no. they do not. despite what's going on - and there is always a lot going on - they insist that the twins clean up their messes. it's nothing short of admirable, really, because i am here to tell you right now......i know that if i were in their situation, i would not have this kind of perseverance. i just wouldn't. trust me. i know myself very well.

their lives have not stopped. so far, they have taken the entire brood to the mall, to the zoo, to the pumpkin farm, to the park for family photos, and to church. i'm still waiting for abby to get a little bit older before i schlep her to the zoo!

in short, they've got it together. they are making this work. and they are happy doing it. you should hear eli when he talks to the kids......he's just so funny and goofy and entertaining! those kids practically have robin williams as patch adams for their dad.

and their mom?

priceless.


so, yeah. pretend they're trees.

and save them.

there's such a thing as a good lump

during "breast cancer awareness month," you might not think so, but there is.


lumps in your breast? not good.

lumps in your mashed potatoes? not good.

lumps (of coal) in your stocking? not good.


but lumps in your throat because your daughter, who turns 29-years old today, says to the world, "ok, world, hit me with your best shot".......and the world hits her with the divorce of her parents and the death of her dad at the precise same time that her first 2 babies are born and the loss of her husband's job on the day they were supposed to close on their house and the loss of her husband's father 6 months after that and guess what - you're pregnant with triplets - .........

and she gets back up - each time - with style and grace. with determination and smiling. with belief in the eternal goodness and rightness of everything.....because that's how God planned it.......

a lump in your throat because of that?


yeah. that's a good lump.

you're not "just sayin" and you're not "just puttin' that out there."

some of the harshest comments, opinions, retorts, etc. that i have ever heard are followed by the words, "just sayin" or "i'm just puttin' that out there."

i wish we'd all be honest and say what we really mean which is, "i'm sayin' what anyone with even the teensiest bit of sense or compassion for a fellow human being would say and if you disagree, you're an idiot."

tacking on "i'm just sayin" or "i'm just puttin' that out there" is another way of saying, "i hope this doesn't offend anyone, but....."

this society is so freaking afraid of offending somebody. i am so freaking sick of everybody being so freaking afraid of offending somebody.

i am even more sick of not telling the truth, which, in this culture, is tantamount to losing your job or worse, gettin sued. when you say, "i'm just sayin," it's just your flimsy-ass attempt at dodging a literal or figurative pink slip. grow some balls.

i'm just sayin.

coffee on the coffee table and my doctor is thinking about joining this wall street crap

some things just make no sense. and other things.....do.

something that makes total sense is putting your coffee cup on your coffee table but until this morning, because i was in a rush and i needed to set it somewhere fast, i don't believe i have ever put my coffee cup on my coffee table.

it looks pretty good there!

and something that makes total no sense is this idiotic wall street protest thing and to make matters worse, my ob/gyn is considering joining them. i told him not to, but on second thought, maybe i should encourage him to go.

see how he likes all us patients sittin' outside his office not payin' him while he's gone. (holdin' signs!)

two unexpected good things that came from doing good things

i try not to do good things for the wrong reasons and one of the "wrongest" of reasons is because it makes me feel good.

that said, this made me feel good:

in keeping with my new commitment to buy something for someone else whenever i go through the fast food line or stop off somewhere to buy a coffee, i told the girl at the drive-thru window at mcdonald's the other morning that i would pay for whatever the car behind me ordered and to just add her bill to mine. after i paid and got my food, i paused long enough to check inside the bag to make sure they gave me what i ordered. (sidebar: they did! first time in history! right?)

next thing i know, the woman in the car behind me pulls up beside me. she motioned for me to roll down my window (i presumed so that she could tell me "thank you"), and she did, in fact, thank me. profusely. but that wasn't the unexpected part. the unexpected part was when she said, "i noticed the Catholic radio bumper sticker on your car. i just switched the dial."

and the second unexpected thing that came from doing a good thing was when charlie discovered my newly installed "poor box," into which i make a donation every morning when i leave the house and every evening when i return.

charlie wanted to take some of the money out of the container and put it into his little hands. his dad knelt down and explained, in 2-year old terms, the concept of charity. he told charlie to put the money back. so that someone who might be hungry or not have a shirt to wear could get one.

and charlie put it back.

not because he understood diddly, because of course, he did not.

but it was a teachable moment and one upon which many more like it in the future can build.



so, in other words, what goes around comes around.

and sometimes........that's a good thing.