the next best thing to being there

i've never whittled.....but i've bought furniture.

never fed chickens.....cooked 'em!

never planted corn.....shucked it, though.

i have never ridden on a tractor.....but i know john deere green.

never made a quilt.....am in awe of them.

never ate at the whistle stop cafe.....but i've had fried green tomatoes.

i've never had moonshine.....but i've had boone's farm.

i have never spent sunrise till sundown doin' chores.....but my daughter has.

i've never played the banjo.....tried my hand at guitar once, though.

never been to the grand ole opry.....except on t.v.

the only one-room schoolhouse i've ever been to was part of a site-seeing tour.....but, i've been to school.

i have never spent an hour or two on the front porch of a country store.....but i have a porch, i've been to the country, and i've been to plenty of stores.

never gone huntin.....but i have a huntin' dog.

never cooked with lard.....but i've used crisco.

i've never lived in a broken down shack on a cold, gray sunday.....but i love the smoke trailing from its chimney.





i've never done a lot of things i love the most. isn't that sad? but, i do them all the time in my mind. isn't that great?





i've never been to a temptations concert.....but i have an imagination every bit as good as theirs. 

and that cozy, little home out in the country.

what happens when you put heat on the ice bucket?

several people, myself included, have pointed out the potential downside to the ice bucket challenge, and we have not been appreciated for doing so. 

here locally, vince tornado, of news radio station 610 WTVN in columbus, ohio, is enduring fans' wrath and threats to boycott his show - because he said that he hates ALS, he loves raising money to find a cure for it, but he isn't so sure the ice bucket gig is the best way to go. 

CRUFICY HIM!



like mr. tornado (not sure if he pronounces it "tore-NAH-doe," or "tore-NAY-doe," although the latter certainly is more apt in this instance), i pointed out some things about the challenge that didn't quite sit right with me, either. and i learned something from having done so: don't ever criticize something that raises money for a good cause.

also like mr. tornado, i am concerned that the focus of this challenge is less on the disease and more on the person dumping cold water on his head. if that's not true, then why don't any of the pictures/videos that i've seen of the people getting cold-soaked include a factoid about ALS, for example - to help educate all of us? or a remark about someone they know who is suffering from the disease? or why don't any of the pictures/videos include an update about the total amount of money raised so far? not to mention, give us the address of where to donate, for pete's sake! but, no. the pictures/videos that i have seen (i'm sure there are exceptions) are only about the person doing the stunt. i think there's something wrong with that, um, picture. video.

this also has the feel of the "WWJD" bracelets that were so popular a few years back. what may have started with good intentions quickly melted into just the next fad.

mostly, though, i wanted to engage others in a discussion of whether or not doing a good thing for a wrong - or partly wrong - reason matters. i think it does!

i think there are times - and this, actually, may in fact be one of them - when the benefit of doing something good with wrong or partly wrong motives does outweigh the wrong motives. do i think it is better to raise more than 41 million dollars for wrong - or partly wrong reasons - to solve a hideous disease than to not raise any money at all? of course, i do.

do i think it is better - and an ideal for which all of us, (goodness gracious, myself most especially included) ought to strive (and to take a really good look at ourselves about) - to raise money solely for the benefit of the benefactor? and that all of the warm fuzzies that we get when our facebook fans chuckle at us and give us high-fives be damned?


yes. 

of course, i do.

how food will save the world

the fact that people don't eat cheese and crackers at cocktail hour anymore isn't the worst thing in the world. but it's close.

people should have cocktail hour and it should include cheese and crackers. to be followed by a dinner of steak, salad, and baked potato. when was the last time you had cheese and crackers at cocktail time followed by a dinner of steak, salad, and baked potato? see what i mean? that's what's wrong with the world.

alternatively, you can have mixed nuts and a beer or herring in sour cream with a nice glass of wine. if you absolutely must abstain from alcohol, then a coke is permissible. followed by pretty much anything you want - which, i admit, is one advantage to abstaining from alcohol.

if you don't feel like cooking you're allowed to go out to eat but ladies, put on a dress and gentlemen, wear a sports coat. act like you've got some sense. and go to a "supper club." if you can't find a "supper club" anywhere, build one. act like you've got some initiative.

after dinner, have coffee. if you're mormon, convert. coffee in a nice little demitasse cup and a very thin slice of plain....traditional......regular cheesecake. what, were you raised in a barn????

and on monday night, eat meatloaf.

the future of the world depends on it.

no phone

my cell phone died, i have ordered a new one, and in the meantime i am without phone service. i love it.


it's been 8 days since it died (but i didn't realize it), 6 days since i realized it, and 6 days since i arranged to get a new one. i seriously considered not getting a new one - but decided to finish out my contract and then, well.........we'll see.

i don't miss it.

not only do i not miss it but, as i said above, i love it. it's like i'm in a cave or something. caves are good.

i come out of my cave to walk down the street to borrow my neighbor's phone. who knew? i have neighbors!

i come out of it to try to find a pay phone. it's like a treasure hunt!

in between times of coming out of my cave, i listen to the silence. who knew? silence still exists!

no beeps, no bells, no notifications, nobody demanding my immediate reply. no nothin. Lord, i could get used to this.

i am used to this!


when my new phone arrives, i'll probably tear into it like grant through georgia. my fingers will probably start flying once again. i'll probably set the thing up so that everyone on God's green earth can contact me in a nanosecond and i'll probably have an individualized sound for each one. i will do these things because although i wish i were living in 1960, i am living in 2014.


but i wish i were living in 1960.

souvenir shops

i am only slightly embarrassed to admit this: i love 'em. in a lot of cases, i'd just as soon skip the site-seeing and go straight to the shop instead.


as a kid, we took some pretty nice vacations. and all of them - or at least almost all of them - had an educational basis. we'd go to places like gettysburg and washington, d.c. and williamsburg and to forts and museums and big mansions like the vanderbilt one and all kinds of places where i was supposed to learn something. and i did. i learned how to scope out gift shops like it was my job. (which, frankly, i always kinda thought it would be fun to work in one.)

the problem was, my parents loathed those kinds of shops. they did everything in their power to avoid them and i always felt like a second class citizen because i liked them. i also had to get creative about getting them to go into one - things like timing my need to go to the bathroom just as we were strolling by the gift shop.


i'm not sure what it is about souvenir shops that i like so much. i recognize that most (all) of the stuff is junk, but i guess i like to pretend that either it's not junk or, if it is, that i'm not above being in the company of something that others think is junk but for some folks, this is how they proudly decorate their homes. and i should be empathetic to that. maybe those tacky gift shops were my first exposure to wanting to be a social worker.


i guess what's making me think about souvenir and gift shops today is because in a few minutes, i'm gonna meet my parents at a restaurant about a half hour from here and the restaurant has a gift shop (albeit an upscale one). whenever my parents and i meet at this restaurant, i make a point of getting there before they do - so i can browse around and not feel like i have to apologize for it.


speaking of restaurants, i remember one on longboat key, florida. that was one of the few vacations we took that didn't include a bunch of schlepping around, learning something.

the restaurant - a seafood one, of course - had a gift shop. somehow, that particular time, my parents were pretty willing to go in it and kill a few minutes. i found one of those snow globe thingies only this one was just filled with blue water and it had fake fish swimming around in it. i asked them if they would buy it for me. and guess what........they did. i have never repaid them for that wonderful favor.


today at the restaurant might be the day i do.

:) 

giving up on going to church

i met a woman yesterday who said she was gonna quit goin' to church. i was hoping she had a non-hackneyed reason why but of course, she didn't. "i'm tired of the hypocrites," she said. (snore.)


i asked her if she'd ever gotten a bad haircut. she looked at me kinda startled-like and said, "um.......yeah. sure."

i asked her if she'd ever eaten at a restaurant and gotten bad food or poor service. "yes. several times."

i asked her if she still gets her hair cut and if she still eats out.



i hope she saw where i was going with this.

(i hope you do, too.)


:)

happy anniversary to my ex-husband

today would have been my 16th wedding anniversary. had my husband, per bjorkman, not decided to leave me.


yesterday, looking ahead to today, was hard. but i hid it well. i didn't show it, i don't think anyone had a clue, and i only discussed it with two very special people. 

but today was easy. i wonder why that is.


perhaps it's because i had myself so prepared for today that once it came, it was like no big deal.

or maybe it's because i spent the day babysitting the kids and so i was too distracted (i was!) to think about it.

or maybe it's because i don't love him anymore.



but i do love him anymore. in some ways, i actually love him more. and that, i think, is the BINGO:


i have replaced tremendous hurt with more love. i didn't do that on my own. not by a long shot. i had the never-ending support of family and close friends - who had the never-ending support of God. because no one can support, never mind love, a pathetic, self-pitying, boo-hooing, curled-up-in-a-ball-and-feeling-like-dying person like i was without the help of God. on their own, human beings just get pissed with people like me. or don't know what to say. but with God, they can do great things.

so can i. so have i.

and so can my ex-husband.


find Him, per.