two things about pride - we aren't supposed to have too much of it and the amount of it that we do have is supposed to be kept private.
i had a client once who fought tooth and nail, with every drop of blood, sweat, and tears that a human being could possibly possess to overcome the hideous damage her father inflicted on her for 9 years of her childhood while he sexually abused her. the wounds this young woman suffered were among the worst - perhaps thee worst - that i have ever, ever seen in my 32-year plus career. i remember one therapy day with her in particular:
me - you have come so, so far.
her - yes. i have. it hasn't been easy.
me - no, it hasn't. but you did it. you did it. you should be proud of yourself.
her - why?
me - because you have worked so hard to get where you are!
her - so?
me - staring at her blankly......
me - sooooooooo.......you should be proud! you should shout it from the rooftops!
her - the only thing i should shout from the rooftops is, thank you, God. the rest of it, i'll keep to myself.
