contrary to extremely popular belief, forgiveness isn't about you. it's about the person you forgive.
forgiveness, which is at its heart a religious concept, has been stripped of its religious roots and given a pop culture makeover.
blech!
once again, as if we haven't had enough of me, me, me and how i feel, here comes yet another very offensive, very screwed up twist on things. and in this case, as in so many others of our day, the thing that has been screwed up started out as a lovely, even sacred thing and we managed to turn it into narcissism.
my profession is largely to blame.
social workers - and those in related fields, such as counseling, psychology, and psychiatry - have polluted everybody's understanding of what forgiveness is all about. social workers - and those in related fields - have pandered to the cry that has been resounding in this country since the 1960s, that is, "if it feels good, do it."
blech.
the purpose of forgiveness, people, is to relieve the offender of his offense. to make him feel better. to release him from the bondage of sin and to give him a fighting chance to do better. not to throw yourself a party. and not even so that you can "move on."
oh, sure, forgiving those who have hurt you helps you, too. and that's a nice by-product. but that's not why you should do it. in fact, if that's why you do it, then somebody needs to forgive you. because you have just sinned.
sorry.
