they don't.
ever since cell phones have come along, i can never reach anybody.
either everybody's phone's not charged or they didn't hear it ringing (hard to hear your cell phone ring with ear buds in your ears), or they forgot to put it on vibrate (please! can't we come up with another word for it than that!), or they don't know where they put it.
or they hit the wrong button and accidentally deleted your call.
and now they can't call you back because they're driving.
and although being busy driving didn't stop them from trying to answer their phone when you called in the first place and then they accidentally deleted your call, the fact that they will now invoke the "i was too busy driving to call you back" clause - however safe that might be - is infuriarting. emergency or not.
the bottom line is, cell phones don't work. and if they did, world history would have no occasions of successful resolutions to an emergency. which we all know is patently false. emergencies have been resolved countless times in the history of mankind - without anyone ever having to shell out bucks to upgrade to unlimited text and data. it's just ridiculous that we think we need cell phones.
what we need is a little perspective here, folks. first of all, hardly anybody ever gets into an emergency in the first place. that's A.
B. is, if a kid does get into an emergency, he likely won't recognize it as such ("i didn't think there were that many drugs at the party, mom!") or, on the rare occasion that a kid will recognize an emergency when it hits him smack in the face, he will justify remaining in the emergency to collect data for his science project ("ok, ok! so i knew there were that many drugs at the party. i was just tryin' to get a better understanding of group behavior and how the different drugs interact with each other.....not to mention maybe find the cure for cancer!")
tell ya what, son.......you find a cure for batteries that need charging and you find a cure for never knowing where the damned cell phone is in the first place and i'll tell your teacher to give you an A on your science project.
but i'm still not buyin' you a phone.
